


Being unlike myself (is like you) but not quite right

by theinvisiblesideuniverse



Category: Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Gen, after lidner and rester visit near and he tells them the story about L, set during and after chapter 108
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:47:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25649767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theinvisiblesideuniverse/pseuds/theinvisiblesideuniverse
Summary: Chapter 108 of Death note, a little different.
Kudos: 1





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Cursive = thoughts  
> Cursive with quotation marks= things others said  
> PLain text= narrator

_Years after Kira seemingly dissapeared from the world, old and sick people in Japan started dying of convenient heart-attacks. Soon the public started recognizing the work of the one some of them worshipped as a saviour, a God. Those who spoke out against Kira once again were quickly drowned out by the ecstatic shouts of his supporters welcoming him back into the world._

_The japanese TV station Sakura TV came back with “Kira´s Kingdom Returns“, a live discussion that anonymusly gaves those pro-Kira and anti-Kira a chance to discuss the recent killings._

_The right to death, thats what they called for and its what they got in the end. After they tore down the barricades shielding their faces from the camera, Kira granted them their desperate wish. The live stream got cut off and I made a broadcast myself, as L, stating I would not get involved. I told C-Kira he was nothing but a murderer..._ Near paused in his thinking to lie down carefully on his back amidst the dozens of tarot card towers he build over the last few days. 

L.

L, over and over again. Like someone planted just this letter on the forefront of his thoughts.  
This one letter representing someone that Near knew next to nothing about, except his motivation.

_“It´s a hobby... it‘s not about justice.“_

Near respectd that, L was honest with the children at Wammy‘s and Near respects and appreciates honesty.

L.  
That one letter that now represents Near.

_But I am not him... I‘m Near._  
_I´m L._  
_Near isn‘t L._

Twirling his snowy hair with his right hand, the young detective stared at the ceiling framed by the walls and towers he created. Picking up the next card he turned it around a few times in his free hand, fascinated with the cool silver reflexes on the scythe.

_Death._ _Change._


	2. Chapter 2

_“There´s no need for you to investigate this case as L would. L is L and you are you Near. What should we do in this situation?“_

_That is the question, isn´t it? I know for sure, L would not get involved because C-Kira doesn´t hold any secrets besides his identity. The method of killing has been discovered and therefore the case is uninteresting.  
But is it reallly? I think his motive is fascinating. Only killing old and sick people but then killing all the panelists on Sakura TV upon request. That would indicate that he has not yet figured out the goal he wants to achieve... It‘s of no use. Everyone already knows that I won‘t get involved, changing my mind now publicaly just won‘t do._

Soundlessly Near walked through the long corridors of his current headquarters in search of Lidner, Rester and Gevanni. He plans to have them contact the japanese police independently from L. Bhat case needs to be solved, people are dying and C-Kira most likely has the shinigami eyes now.  
He was well aware that L had no real interest in justice, but Near did strive to solve his cases as efficiently as possible because to him, the lack of knowledge, the unsolveable nature of those cases he took up, was an injustice in itself. His hunger for truth and distaste for dishonesty left him with the need to find the solution to questions most people can´t even think to ask.

“Near! We have to get involved in the Kira case, surely that Braodcast was a trick to get Kira to feel safe?“, Gevanni looked at his young Boss wide eyed upon noicing his presence i the room, disbelieve cleary written on his face.

“That‘s why I am here, I want you to contact the NPA and cooperate with them on the investigation. I will assist you, not acting as L though.“, Near reached for his hair before continuing.“ We‘ll act as the SPK, should anyone ask.“

“I‘m glad that you decided to get involved after all, Near but may I ask, what prompted that change of mind?“

“You told me earlier that I don‘t need to think like L to investigate this case and you‘re right. L would not investigate the case at all, it wouldn‘t concern him. But I‘m Near. I dont‘t share L‘s motivations. That‘s something I seemed to have lost sight of in the last few years. Thank you for reminding me, Lidner.“, turning around to leave his agents to their work but stopping in his tracks he said quietly:" I need to stop trying to imitate L to perfection, as I´ve come to realise that would be quite immoral. I don´t have the right to decide who is worth being stopped, based on what I think a dead person would find to be interesting.“

Making his way back towards his room full of fragile letters he thought, _L is dead, while I am not. I´m Near and Near isn´t L. But L is Near right now. In conclusion, I am myself while trying to be someone I am clearly not. That creates an unnecessary detour in my thinking that hinders me in being the most effecient I can be and it needs to stop._

_L is dead._  
_Near is not._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The quotes written in cursive are quotes from chapter 108 of death note and belong to the original author.


End file.
